I was being blocked!
Yippy yeyyy… I finally can access my blog again…
I dunno what happened in the past few days. The error message kept on coming everytime I clicked the "update blog" button. Those few days were, in fact, the time when I did need to "speak out loud". Hmmm…you know, the first week of a new semester thing…when you’re held in classes after quite a long break? Being unprepared? Being unable to think fast? And only the lecturers and some students who talked in the same language? You know that kind of feeling?
Anyway, I ended up calling out my friends and k when I was really stressed out and completely powerless (I mean physically and mentally here) at the same time. Well, that’s the good thing of having more (I’m not saying "many") friends. So that when one or two or more of your friends are not available, you can always run to the other one(s). Otherwise, you’d be screwed.
But I found it funny the different moods I was made swing into when I was trying to contact my friends and asking for an impossible escape. Let me go through the list:
A friend picked up my call but asked me to call him later and remained unavailable ’till that late evening.
Another friend, as always, listened to me thoughtfully when I blurted out, saying what I wanna say.
Another friend quickly replied my sms with a "Yes" and got dressed to meet me though I knew that she was reading a lecture note at home.
My sis tried to console me with series of suggestions based on her experience, which always sounds easy to her. Yea, she always takes it easy when it comes to school stuffs, she’s always managed to remain calm and score.
My k, out of my expectation, was "quite available" to kiddingly respond to my "live report". It had been quite some time we didn’t chat. I didn’t even remember when the last time I talked to him on the phone was. Two months were his figure. I’m not sure. Well, it doesn’t matter. I was more concerned with what I realized -how familiar his voice was to my ear and how much I missed the comfort in it. You know people often say, "You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone."? The opposite is equivalently valid, "You don’t know what you’ve missed until it’s found." though it may sound implausible at first (how come you’re able to tell that you’ve found "that something" if you never know what you’re looking for or don’t even feel like missing something).
Another friend, a-good-normal-friend-supposed-to-be, was out of reach.
And then I said to God, "Yea, here we are again, after all ups and ups and downs I’ve had recently, it’s only me and You again at the end."
